Intro -x2-: C0 C71 Fsus22 G7sus43 G74 0 1Verse: C5 C76 2Sid Vicious played a four-string Fender bass guitar and couldn’t sing Fsus27 G7sus48 G79 3And everybody hated him except the ones who loved him C10 C711 A12 ukulele has four strings, but Sid did not play ukulele Fsus213 G7sus414 G715 4He did smack and probably killed his girlfriend Nancy Spungen 5 6Verse: C16 C717 7If only Sid had had a ukulele, maybe he could have been happy Fsus218 G7sus419 G720 8Maybe he would not have suffered such a sad end C21 C722 9He maybe would have not done all that heroin instead Fsus223 G7sus424 G725 10He maybe would’ve sat around just singing nice songs to his girlfriend 11 12Chorus: C26 C727 13So play your favorite cover song, especially if the words are wrong Fsus228 G7sus429 G730 14Cos even if your grades are bad, it doesn’t mean you’re failing C31 C732 15Do your homework with a fork and eat your fruit loops in the dark Fsus233 G7sus434 G735 16And bring your etch-a-sketch to work and play your ukulele 17 18Bridge: Fsus236 G737 19Ukulele small and forceful, ukulele, brave and peaceful C38 Fsus239 20You can play the ukulele too it is painfully simple Fsus240 G741 21Play your ukulele badly, play your ukulele loudly A#642 22Ukulele banish evil, ukulele save the people, 23 24Ukulele gleaming golden on the top of every steeple 25 26Verse: C43 C744 27Lizzie borden took an axe, and gave her mother forty whacks Fsus245 G7sus446 G747 28Then gave her father forty-one, and left a tragic puzzle C48 C749 29If only they had given her an instrument, those puritans Fsus250 G7sus451 G752 30Had lost the plot completely, see what happens when you muzzle 31 32Verse: C53 C754 A55 person’s creativity and do not let them sing and scream Fsus256 G7sus457 G758 33And nowadays it’s worse ‘cause kids have automatic handguns C59 C760 34It takes about an hour to teach someone to play the ukulele Fsus261 G7sus462 G763 35G#out same to teach someone to build a standard pipe bomb you do the math-s- 36 37Chorus: C64 C765 38So play your favorite cover song, especially if the words are wrong Fsus266 G7sus467 G768 39Cos even if your grades are bad, it doesn’t mean you’re failing C69 C770 40Do your homework with a fork and eat your fruit loops in the dark Fsus271 G7sus472 G773 41And bring your etch-a-sketch to work and play your ukulele 42 43Bridge: Fsus274 G775 44Ukulele, thing of wonder, ukulele, wand of thunder C76 Fsus277 45You can play the ukulele too in London and down under Fsus278 G779 46Play Joan Jett, and play Jacques Brel and Eminem and Neutral Milk A#680 47Tell the children crush the hatred, play your ukulele naked 48 49If anybody tries to steal your ukulele, let them take it 50 51Verse: C81 C782 52Imagine there’s no music, imagine there are no songs Fsus283 G7sus484 G785 53Imagine that John Lennon wasn’t shot in front of his apartment C86 C787 Fsus288 54Now imagine if John Lennon had composed “Imagine” for the ukulele G7sus489 G790 55Maybe people would have truly got the message 56 57Verse: C91 C792 58You may think my approach is simple-minded and naïve Fsus293 G7sus494 G795 59Like if you want to change the world then why not quit and feed the hungry C96 C797 60But people for millennia have needed music to survive Fsus298 G7sus499 G7100 61And that’s why I’ve promised John that I will not feel guilty 62 63Verse: C101 C7102 64So play your favorite Beatles song and make the subway fall in love Fsus2103 G7sus4104 G7105 65They’re only $19.95, that isn’t lots of money C106 C7107 66Play until the sun comes up and play until your fingers suffer Fsus2108 G7sus4109 G7110 Play LCD111 Soundsystem songs on your ukulele 67 68Verse: C112 C7113 69Quit the bitching on your blog and stop pretending art is hard Fsus2114 G7sus4115 G7116 70Just limit yourself to three chords and do not practice daily C117 C7118 71You’ll minimize some stranger’s sadness with a piece of wood and plastic Fsus2119 G7sus4120 G7121 72Holy xxxx it’s so fantastic, playing ukulele 73 74Verse: C122 C7123 75Eat your homework with a fork and do your fruit loops in the dark Fsus2124 76And bring your etch-a-sketch to work, your flask of jack, your vibrator 77your fear of heights, your nikon lens 78 79Verse: C125 C7126 80Your mom and dad, your disco stick, your soundtrack from “Karate Kid” Fsus2127 G7sus4128 G7129 Your ginsu knives, your rosary, your new Rebecca Black CD130 C131 C7132 81Your favorite room, your bowie knife, your stuffed giraffe, your new glass eye Fsus2133 G7sus4134 G7135 82Your sousaphone, your breakfast tea, your Nick Drake tapes, your giving tree C136 C7137 83Your ice cream truck, your missing wife, your will to live, your urge to cry Fsus2138 C139 84Remember we’re all going to die so play your ukulele 85