Intro: C G Am G F G Am F C G The books you think I wrote are way too thick Am F C G Who needs a thousand metaphors to figure out you shouldn't be a dick Am F C G And I don't watch you when you sleep Am F C Em F Surprisingly I don't use my own omnipotence to be a ******* creep Am G F You're not going to heaven Am G F Why the xxxx did you think I'd ever kick it with you Am G None of you are going to heaven F Am G F There's a trillion aliens cooler than you Interlude: F F F Am G You shouldn't abstain from rape just Am G F because you think that I want you to Interlude: F F F Am G C You shouldn't rape because rape is a xxxxed up thing to do Interlude: C G Am G F G -It's pretty obvious just don't ******* **** people I didn't think I had to write that one down for you.- Am F C G I don't think masturbation is obscene Am F C It's absolutely natural and the weirdest G Am ******* thing I've ever seen F C G You make my job a living hell Am F C I sent gays to fix overpopulation G F Didn't that go well Am G F You're not going to heaven Am G F Eat a thousand crackers sing a million hymns Am G F None of you are going to heaven Am G F You're not my children you're a bad game of sims Interlude: F F F Am G Am G F You shouldn't abstain from pork because you think that I want you to Interlude: F F F Am G C You can eat pork because why the xxxx would I give a xxxx Interlude: C G Am G F G -I created the uniVerse you think I'm drawing the line at the ******* deliaisle?- Am F C G You argue and you bicker and you fight Am F C G Am Atheists and Catholics, Jews and Hindus argue day and night F C G Over what they think is true Am F C G F But no one entertains the thought that maybe god does not believe in you Am G F You pray so badly for heaven Am G F knowing any day may be the day that you die Am G F But maybe life on earth could be heaven Am G F Doesn't just the thought of it make it worth a try Interlude: F F F F C F G My love's the type of thing that you have to earn C F C G And when you earn it you won't need it Am G Am G F I'm not gonna give love just cause I know that you want me to Am G C If you want love then the love is gonna come from you Interlude: C G Am G F G